For The Love of Cheeseburgers

**A recap so my momma can get current as to what I've been up to since my abandonment**


Day 1 - I pretty much lounged around all day in a semi-depressed state clutching my locket, rocking back and forth humming lullaby's my mother used to sing to me. Minutes passed, maybe even an hour...but finally, through my haze of weariness I found the strength to ferociously attack Old Man Lily. That cheered me up.

Day 2 - The one known as Alaina taxied me and that hunky piece of Ace flesh to them thar hills. Pulling in the parking lot w/half my body hanging out the window I was able to read the sign through my watery half closed bug encrusted eyes which said "Old Mans Cave" but it must've been mistaken..we passed plenty of old men but not one cave *hrmf*.. The whole 5 miles were a huge swimming, grass eating, barking, sniffing, peeing on trees, running, pulling that fat arse known as Alaina blur. i don't remember the details, it's like my brain leaves my body when i go bye-bye. I do know I had fun. On the way home the one known as Alaina stopped at the "magic window that gives you yummy food". I was ravenously hungry. The one known as Alaina must've realized this because I was given my own delicious scrummy glorious cheeseburger!! I snatched it away from her grubby hands and immediately devoured it in lady-like fashion. First I ate the top bun to replenish my dwindling carbohydrate stores, then I grabbed the bottom bun with the speed and precision of 10 velosorapters just cause I can. Then I ate the fauxburger patty and promptly spit out the pickles. At home I zonked out under my couch the rest of the evening. It was a great day.

Day 3 - Went for a short car ride with Old Man Lily and the ones known as Alaina and Amanda. Got out and witnessed two old people making out on a bench at the only prime swimming location. Me and Old Man Lily didn't care, it was too hot to be grossed out by the elderly rounding first base. The one known as Amanda threw some sticks for me to fetch. I happily obliged and did a couple penguin slides off the bank into the water while Old Man Lily was stuck in the mud. Har Har Har! The one called Alaina had to wedge a leash under her tail and haul her out of the water. Then we walked over to a big fenced area where there were lots of dogs off leash. At first I liked it but pretty soon Gigantor wouldn't get out of my face, so I had to show a couple mutts who's boss (...i'll give you a hint, it ain't Springsteen..*snickers*). After that little scrap I was leashed whilst Old Man Lily walked around aimlessly. We hung around the big fenced yard for a bit then headed to the car. And damn..I looked toward the prime swimming spot longingly and the old people were still making out!!